Sebastian’s Five Steps For A Life Well Lived

There are many things I learned from Sebastian but these five lessons stand out from all the other...

Love yourself and the World

His love was omnipresent.  It began with his love of self and his passion for living. Not for things he could acquire and accomplish, but for the love of life and living itself….

The simple fact is, our capacity to love is our most precious gift of all.  

To love another person deeply is where true purpose lives. We are learning now more than ever that we can love our job, our house, our things, our places, but when they are taken away, we survive.  Maybe with stress, anxiety and worry of what is next, but we still have next.  

To lose someone we love, never leaves us because their presence can’t be replaced.  Hopefully they will teach us that loving another, while it is the greatest risk of all, is still worthy because loving is our true compass for a life well lived.  Nothing is permanent.  But loving again is the courage of our faith that we will always be together with the one we love.

It is amazing how much we can love one person, but not ourself.  It is our self criticism or self hate that turns into our hatred we see in the world.  We can see the damage that comes with the absence of love.  

May we chose love always

Own Your Life

He set the course for his life which wasn’t always easy to do. His sheer will and drive to go after what he loved brought him back to the states alone, living with a family he didn’t know,  when he was only 17. He dealt with every disappointment and hardship as if it were a storm that soon would pass.  Not letting it slow him down for long, but taking responsibility for diverting his course back to calmer seas.  

Like all our lives, there were upsets, disappointments, overwhelm and fear of what can’t be, but always there were no excuses,  His deep responsibility for living life on purpose teaches us to remember why we are here.  Not to be dropped out of the sky like a falling star but to soar across the sky leaving a trail of light that shines for all to see.

He taught me the preciousness of each moment and the importance of responsibility for not wasting time.  Being conscious and choosing….this thing we call life is our legacy, which we are building every second, with every choice we make.  What we will be remembered for.

Make Everyone Your Best Friend

As we celebrated his life one year ago and continue to do every day, the common theme is that every single one of us thought we were his best friend.  How can one young man impact so many lives in that way.  Simply because his presence was his present to the world.  He walked into the room as if you were the most important person in the room.  Not him.  

His huge heart filled hugs made you feel like you were the most valuable person on the planet and his deep smile and eyes made you feel like a better human being.  He listened, he cared, he laughed and he loved deeply with you.  He teaches us the power of being everyone’s best friend

Empower others not yourself 

Today and Tomorrow

He kept it simple.  This moment and the next.  Today and tomorrow.  

What can I achieve today and what can I leave for tomorrow?  Not the endless lists of to do’s that bury us in self loathing, disappointment and beat us down in life.  All the shoulda, woulda, coulda’s that overwhelm us and keep us spinning in the idea that it is easier to just give up and sit on the couch all day.  Who are we to believe that we have something to offer the world.  Instead, he teaches the wisdom that what we do in every moment matters and that we are here on purpose.

He understood the power of how tiny steps towards a goal, consistently over time, will achieve the desired outcome.  He teaches us to be present in the present of life.  Nothing is guaranteed and each moment could be our last.  Time is not in endless supply and something that should be wasted.  Being conscious and valuing the sands of time slipping through the hourglass of our life, is living a purpose filled life.

Always Be Learning

Plan.Do.Review

Sebastian had a diary where he created his plan for life because he understood that having a clear destination, setting the course for every step along the way, is the secret to living.  It provides the roadmap for your life.  Which is why it is so funny we wouldn’t start driving our car to a new destination, believing we are not going to get there. In fact, we punch the address into our GPS so we make sure we get there in the shortest amount of time.  But we rarely make a plan for where we desire our life to lead.  Set a vision, create the course of action with the confidence and belief we will get there in life.

He teaches us not only to set goals and our course, but review where we are every three months, giving himself a “congratulations!” and “keep up the good work” to celebrate how far he had come.  He also understood the importance of resetting his course based on challenges or diversions along the way.  He knew where he was, the importance of learning from every decision, and the courage to take what you learned and recalibrate your  course and life.  Don’t be stuck on the end result but on the journey of self discovery.

Click HERE to download the 5 Steps for a Live Well Lived.